It’s 4.30 AM, and I didn’t know why I awaken. I stared at the blank ceiling, tried to hear any voices, and relieved that there wasn’t any sound of the rain. I thought of Jakarta and the flood. I prayed that today would be a sunny day.
I was grateful that I could move to Puncak as soon as the water got into my house. I checked my twitter for any updates in Jakarta. Some of my friends twit that they got the electricity again, some still on the black outs. The twits about how grateful they were caught my attention.
Isn’t it easy to be grateful when the flood get into your house and you still have the second floor to save yourself? Isn’t it pretty easy to be grateful when you still have food to eat? Isn’t it easy to be grateful when you still can twit, even in the middle of black out and flood? Isn’t it easy to tell other to be patient and grateful no matter what the situation are? Some of students even take this flood as the unexpected break and feel grateful about it.
But this morning I thought about people who’ve been evacuated because the water have sunk half of their house. People who don’t have access to clean water.
They who lost their relatives because of the flood. They who starved, who is sick, and have to sleep without shelter. I wonder if they still can be grateful. How could you be grateful when the cross you bear felt heavier than others? I tried to imagine myself in their position, and I doubt myself.
And I started to question what makes people grateful? What makes me grateful? I think I can be thankful for something when I stop comparing myself to others, or when I count my own blessings instead of others. I don’t know if people out there who experiencing the flood are grateful or not. May some of them do, and others don’t. But I realized that being grateful is a choice, a state of mind. A faith that our God is always good.